Saibaba , I miss you!

I have no clue .. where did I meet him ..but I did in some previous birth of mine ..that I am sure about.

Sai … this name gives me chills sometimes … at other times it gives the long needed calmness.😇

So, I was narrating the story of my Shirdi trip.We (me and my junior) were shopping and we took some rings..few were black , one was golden and I was checking the size.I wore one in my ring finger. I looked at my hand and the black ring looked good on it. Suddenly , a thought ,that I know came from the Sai effect, left a mark on me… it said “Look at these dogs.. sitting here without any jwellery to decorate their bodies .. this body will be turned into ashes..and here we are adoring it with rings and all.” This thought changed my mind suddenly ..I bought the ring but did not wear it ,after coming from shirdi.

Sai devotion changes you like this. This thought will change my future decisions ..its not just a few seconds thought that came and went away will change my whole belief and existence. That is how strong baba’s company is.

As a third person ..others can’t understand why I gave so much importance to such a random thought. But I know and he knows what this is!

Though ,mortally he is absent. But I know he is always with his devotees. The more you take his name ..more he will be felt closer and more you change into a true human being.

Last year similar episode occurred ..when I found a beautiful red chura (large bangles) .I was attracted towards that and I bought it for me. My sister also liked it. It was karwa chauth after 2 days. I took it and came home. When I slept , I got a dream where someone was saying ..these are not real. Why to care for this soo much?And in that dream those bangles turned into coals.

It seems Sai does not want me to get attracted towards these materialistic things. So , I left wearing any jwellery except on occassions. I don’t wear gold jwellery like a normal Indian married woman does.

People ask me why I stay like this ..but I can’t explain how these experiences have left a mark on me that changed me totally.

So, coming back to the trip.. I had a smile that stayed sticked upon my face the whole time in Shirdi. I felt like I got the “home”.. where I belong. 😇

I felt heavy hearted while going back from Shirdi. I controlled my tears .. by telling myself that baba is in my heart.. always within me.

I wish I can go there every year from now onwards.

I also visited my home and in laws and when I was with my mother in law ..I saw a vision with open eyes.. like I was telling her that I am pregnant.

Sai baba only knows if this will happen and when. Yet we have not decided to conceive a child.

Sai, I just want to stay at your feet.

let my pride be burnt in your dhuni.

let me be burnt in your dhuni .

and be merged into you.

Till then , I miss you baba

om sairam 😇


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